To be sure I may not be ahead of my time. I am afraid anymore that I am falling behind. All the copywrite dates on these books and the posting dates on YouTube and other channels, movies and media make me realize how far behind I am. That I am not a trailblazer. I am not the Pioneer. I am following a path along with so many others. So many that I have not met. I am assimilating as fast as I can.
So while meditation may have brought me to a place within that makes me want to share, I am not sure what I am sharing. It’s possible that what I am meant to share is as clear as the nose on my face, so obvious that I cannot see it for myself. That would not surprise me.
I suppose my own favorite meditation lately is the exercise of getting my body and my brain together in the ‘now’ of each moment in meditation. I don’t know how long ago I started really thinking about slowing, no stopping, the futurism of my brain and bringing that racing brain back to where my body is (seated comfortably in a chair).
The whole exercise started as I found myself reaching back to my buddhist roots during a simple meditation session to call forth my buddhist nature. In the forty years I have been practising buddhism I have found the most fulfilling times, moments days and years, of my practise were when I was ‘filled’ with a presence greater than myself. That filling came while I was in active buddhist prayer and chanting. I have to admit, I could spend an hour easily in buddhist chanting prayer – it felt so good. I would come away feeling high. My then boyfriend (now husband) asked me one afternoon if I had been smoking something. That’s when I realized how strong this inner being can be. I came to rely on this prayer to calm and strengthen me. It’s not a bad thing to fall back on. But an hour is a long stretch of time to pull from one’s day. My meditations now are fifteen minutes, and silent and overwhelming me still with insight, and calmness and a self that is more than self.
Yes, I do miss the time I spent in buddhist prayer. I loved the ritual, the sounds, the smells, the postures, the sacredness of it all. I have my alter, my Budsudan. I love that it waits for me without screaming at me for attention, or complaining that I don’t come visit anymore or hardly ever. Inanimate objects are amazingly patient. Much like the dishes in my sink waiting to be rinsed and put in the dishwasher. They’ll wait all night without a peep out of them.
Meditation does not come with these accoutrements. No need for candles and incense or offerings of any kind. Meditation only requires my time. I am finding these simple meditations to be as powerful as the peace and authenticity I found with the formal buddhist format. Meditation is almost an anywhere thing. I only need a comfortable chair and fifteen minutes undisturbed. Twenty years ago in the throes of full on buddhist fulfillment I would have called my bluff. I would have told me that nothing comes easy. Do your time. Get on your meditation perch (assume the position?) and power through till enlighenment arrives.
I guess enlightenment arrived. for these days I am satisfied. I am happy. The timing in my life is exquisite and I am fortunate every single day. I wish the same for every one. Every single person. May they find this when they are ready – but of course they will. As the dishes wait for attention and we continue to breathe.